It hardly seems like it could be 11 years since Fito and I exchanged vows and rings! In someways it feels like 4 or 5 years. In others, I can barely remember a time when we weren’t together.
Without a doubt, our relationship is the greatest gift in my life. It is foundational to everything else.
It is easy to think that because our relationship is strong, that the past 11 years have been easy. I suppose in the ways that really matter, like communication, compatibility and joy, it has been. At the same time…, man, have we been through the wringer!
Everything has been turned upside down and backwards. What was, has been destroyed. What is, has been reconstructed and built from the ground up. There are a few things like the home we live in that are familiar. However, so much is new; so much has changed.
This is where time really gets distorted. My mother moved here to be with us a year after we got married. I started my business 2 years after that. Fito started his the following year. There are so many people, in our lives now, that seem like they were or should have been with us when we made our commitment to one another 11 years ago!
Here is the thing. I’m not sure anything that has happened in the past 11 years.., would have, if we had not had this relationship. It is not that we couldn’t have done them on our own.., it is more a question of ‘would we’!?!
I know for me, it was becoming apart of Fito’s family that opened me to the possibility of mine being with or near me. As close as I am to my family, I was use to living thousands of miles away from them. The distance was comfortable for me.
Yet, there I was surrounded by Fito’s family, including his mom, Mama Chela. Six of his eight siblings lived within a few minutes from us. Even with the normal ups and downs of family dynamics, we were steady. Our corner of the world was solid. When it was time for my mother to join us.., we are both ready. Let’s face it.., Fito is family oriented, he was always ready. He helped me catch up.
I highly doubt I would have ever started my business, if I were not with him. As it was, leaving the company I had been with for 26 years, felt like I was cutting all the cords that kept life stable and predictable. The only safety net was Fito. There to encourage and support me. There to catch me if I fell. I needed his grounding and calm to set sail in this new direction.
I am sure Fito would have eventually started his own business. That is who he is. I knew this within weeks of meeting him almost 14 years ago! However, I am not sure it would have been this business or in the timeframe that it has happened. I too am a safety line and net for him. He knows I am his biggest cheerleader and champion. He knows I would catch him if he were to stumble or fall.
Everyday we step into the unknown. None of us know what the future holds. The world can be a crazy place. Chaos seems to be the norm. I know this. We know this. Yet, because we are there for one another.., because our relationship is always present.., there is also this cozy, comforting place called ‘our relationship’ where each of us gets to celebrate, relax and be restored.
Today, 11 years later, I am filled with gratitude for this relationship. I am thrilled for whatever comes next. It is sometimes hard for me to believe that I could be more in Love now, then when we began to walk this journey together.
Thanks for letting me share this special day with you!
And to my beloved husband Fito… I Love You More 😍
With Light, Love, and Laughter