I have a huge appreciation for the spiritual journey I have been on and all of it’s gifts. And I still find myself questioning how to incorporate it more fully into my daily existence.
Many people think that meditation, yoga or other mind-body-spirit practices are done for the experiences you have while developing or participating in the practice itself. But the truth is, it is much more about how they affect or alter us as we go about our daily lives.
I spend a good deal of time thinking about how to live my life in a more intentional way. In fact it is a big part of how and why I do what I do. How and why I would create a business like Storm Wisdom.
YET.., this doesn’t mean everything is easy! There I times I really feel off track, or wonder if I have learned anything at all. The last couple of weeks has been like that for me.
My beloved has been sick for two weeks. He is dealing with shifting and moving symptoms. We focus on one area of illness only to have it replaced with another. We get insight, information, direction and diagnosis/treatment on one thing and then something else takes its place.
It is really hard to watch. It is really hard to know what to do next. And although he is much better than he was, he is still not feeling back to himself… and in fact today, is having similar symptoms as he had when this all first started on New Years Day. WTH!!
I have been thinking a lot about his emotional dexterity. His ability to recognize, feel and release the emotional energies that come with his body being so physically challenged. How does he keep his morale high when he feels so shitty? How can he tap into his emotional energy body to help balance and strengthen his weakened state? To follow the roadmap back to wellness?
Then I realize I have to do the same thing. I am experiencing emotional ups and downs right along with him. Everything has an increased sense of urgency. Every choice or decision feels as if it requires rapid response. I go from fear to hopeful or worried and concerned to exhausted or relieved. How can I be on track and lost at the same time?
Developing dexterity with our emotions is important work. It helps us to stay connected to our own higher, internal guidance even during times of stress. It ensures that we are present and responding to what is right in front of us. It helps us to understand how past emotional patterns, wounding or experiences are affecting whatever situation we are dealing with. And there is so much more that having the ability to be current with our emotions does for us.
But that doesn’t mean we get a pass on actually feeling and experiencing them. They are REAL. Our emotions are always with us… sometimes playing Russian Roulette even!
This is what I am aware of right now! Because it is so hard to watch someone we love go through such a challenging time, we think it is about them. But we are challenged as well! Not the physical symptoms or battling the disease.., but our own version.
In someways I would rather be the one sick, as it would be much easier then watching someone I love go through this. But my work is to be present to my own emotions. To ensure that my emotions are being honored, and that they are in sync with and aligned with the situation and circumstances. Otherwise it is really hard to respond to what is going on. To make choices that are informed, and not reactionary.
As difficult as the past couple weeks have been, I am very aware that this experience would be having much more challenging without taking the time to develop some emotional dexterity. A practice I am committed to continuing. Even if at times I feel a bit lost!
With Light, Love, and Laughter