I have a love-hate relationship with being future-oriented.
On the one hand, it’s a superpower. The ability to envision a goal, destination, or dream off in the distance—and then understand what it takes to get there—has allowed me to craft an amazing life.
But on the other hand, I find myself worrying about the future, especially when I feel like I have no control over it. Sometimes, it can feel paralyzing.
So much of any spiritual practice or journey of self-awareness is about being present. Staying in the moment or living in the now. While I’ve gotten a bit better at that, it still requires focused effort. I really have to pull myself back from my future focus, usually after I’ve already spent way too much time caught up in it.
It affects my mental health. Truthfully, it affects my emotional and physical health, too. I can be on cloud nine one moment and unsure the next. This yo-yo effect takes a toll. It throws me off, making me feel like something is wrong. Yet, when I take time to reflect on what’s causing this feeling, there’s nothing tangible. It’s clear I’m stressing over something that hasn’t happened—and may never happen.
It’s a vicious cycle that can feel isolating. I don’t even know who to talk to about it. If I figured out who, what would I say? And if I knew what to say, why would I be talking to them? Would it be just to feel like I’m not alone? Would I expect them to have my answers? Or just to get confirmation?
I usually end up reflecting inward. That’s often a good thing, but I’m also aware it’s a long-held pattern—something I’ve dealt with for most of my life, even before I knew I had this tendency.
So what’s the answer? Or is there one?
Maybe the answer isn’t about fixing my future focus, or forcing myself to stay in the present all the time. Perhaps it’s more about recognizing when that future-oriented part of me takes over and gently pulling myself back. Giving myself permission to let go of the need for control, while also embracing the part of me that dreams, plans, and prepares.
It’s not always easy, but what if the key isn’t in trying to change who I am—but in learning to trust that the future will unfold as it needs to, even without my constant worrying or effort? Maybe the real power is in knowing that I don’t have to figure it all out right now.
What if the future wasn’t something to control, worry about, or even predict? What if it’s just something we learn to dance with, one step at a time?
