Man in the Mirror

I was having a conversation yesterday with a friend who is going through a lot.  The end of a long term relationship.   Changes with their work.  Creating a new relationship with their body.  Even a possible move to another city.

There are so many areas of their life that seem to be up in the air.  They were feeling the stress of it all.  Yet among the chaos there was another theme that was also coming to the surface.  Without planning it, it was obvious, this was the ideal time to focus on them!

It really got me thinking about how important it is for all of us to do the same thing.

Not just when the ups and downs or challenges of life are upon us.  But all the time.  To take care of ourselves and stay current with who we are and who we are becoming.

Like so many of us, my friend is very comfortable in the role of giver.  Especially when it comes to family and friends.  But when the circumstances change, are we prepared to give to ourselves?

Most of us would never consider ‘rushing’ one of the important people in our lives, through a grief or healing process.  Yet, are we willing to give ourselves time?  When someone close to us has a need, we step in and try to accommodate.  Would we spend or give the same to ourselves?

We get so busy navigating the day-to-day and keeping the plates spinning that we forget to stop and assess whether or not those plates are even ours to spin anymore.  They might have been.  But are they still?

I heard myself say to them, “this is an ideal time to get current with who you are and what you really want now”.  Even as I was saying it, I realized it is just as true for me as it is for them.

How many of us are motivated by dreams that have already died?  Make decisions based on circumstances or people who are no longer relevant in our lives?

What I enjoy now, would have been nails on a chock-board to a younger me.  And many things that were important to me when I was younger, no longer offer stimulation.  There are lot of big or obvious ones here… but what about the smaller more subtle ones?  Am I paying attention to those too?

Getting current with ourselves is powerful work.  It is not only about letting go of what no longer fits.  It is also about stepping into those things that are calling us anew.  Maybe a dream that never quite formed or seemed out of reach.  Exploring a new type of creativity.  Connecting with a new group or making a new friend.  Embracing a new practice or leaning into one long forgotten.

There are so many possible options here…

I for one, want to sit with the possibilities.  To see what gets my attention.  If I am current, what is compelling to me now?  This is not about reinvention.., but with the right tweaks and modifications, more alignment with who I already am.

This conversation started out, seemingly, about someone else.  I quickly realized this is just one of the elegant ways the Universe offers us the opportunity for personal reflection.  As with so many things, it ended up being about the man in the mirror.

With Light, Love, and Laughter
Charles

3 Comments

  1. I am so sad to have had to cancel our visit this past weekend, I’m on the mend and meds!! Rest and reflect so you writing hits a major chord for me too. Thank you for sharing you with all of us who love you.

    Reply
    • Thanks Mary. I was also disappointed to hear not only were you not coming but that you were sick on top of that! Get better FAST! Sending you Love and Light!

      Reply
  2. I just came across and posted a C.S. Lewis quote, “You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.” And, here is Charles with yet another resonant and timely post! Your commitment to presence and self awareness are (is?) a gift to me! Thank you!

    Reply

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