I am up to things. Change wants and needs to occur. Sometimes I can see or sense what needs to happen with clarity. Other times, the solutions seem murky. Seeing or sensing what wants to happen and knowing how to go about creating the change are two different things. Which is another reminder that one of my biggest lessons over the past ten years or so is ‘letting go of the How.’. So, why am I surprised that I am visiting this lesson again?
Here is what I have noticed this week. As soon as the destination or solution is clear for me~I immediately start moving in that direction. AND I instantaneously have decided the course I am on and how long it will take me to get there. Then, as I am navigating my new course, I find there is a giant ravine that makes this course impossible! But wait!!! I have already decided how I am going to get to my desired goal. So, instead of looking for alternatives or letting go of ‘how’~I dig in. I spend a lot of time and energy trying to figure out how to get across the darn ravine. It isn’t until I have lost all patience and am ready to give up that I notice there is a metaphoric ‘hot air balloon’ behind me!
I am stubborn. I value independence. I am spoiled enough to want things my way. I am also naive enough to be surprised, when the more simple, or elegant, or practical, or magical way presents itself. Usually AFTER I have given up all hope (yes, with that level of drama!).
This week I have been reminded, that my life is guided and that the Universe conspires to take care of me. That the biggest obstacle in front of me is not the journey I am on, but my relentless commitment to doing it a particular way which frequently means on my own. I am also reminded that when I let go of ‘How’… Magic happens! Then I chuckle, because this is something I swore I would never forget! And oh yeah… I am human!