Guilt Be Gone

You’ve probably noticed I don’t really edit my writing. It is a bit of a thought dump…, and if I really took the time to edit for grammar, punctuation and spelling, it would be too much of a task or burden. It would take me so long to “get it right”, that I probably would have given up on writing a long time ago. I do usually take one good look for those glaring mistakes – which I still sometimes miss anyway. The process is like this… I write…, I read it out loud to myself or Fito. Fix any obvious problems and then send it off to my trusty tech-guy Paul, who then gets it into the right template/format. When the entire newsletter is done, I get it back and do a review and approval… and send it off for publishing. What I found last week when I re-read the article (Ebb and Flow) after it was in the final format, was that I feeling ‘guilt’ while reading it. As if my present circumstances seemed too luxurious or like I wasn’t doing enough. I wasn’t “working hard enough”. Or maybe I was just being lazy. I have to say I was a bit surprised. I hadn’t noticed the guilt before that…, but once I did, I realize it has been there since I made the decision to step back and take this time for myself. So on the one hand I am thrilled about giving myself this time to be… on the other I feel guilt. These two are incongruent. They actually work against one another. The thing...

Dropping Excess Weight

These days it seems as if most of my energies are directed towards letting go of something that I created in the past!  Whether it is a painful memory, an emotional wound or a limiting belief; it seems they insist on being released, forgiven and forgotten! Don’t think this means I am being intentional about selecting these experiences or memories.  Instead, out of the blue I realize I am mentally reliving or remembering them.  Sometimes in my remembering or recalling of these life events, I am mentally reliving them in a new way.  I get to say what I wanted to say or I stop the interaction before it goes to far.  In my mind I am altering the past. Yet, it is not the mental gymnastics that is important here.  It is that I realize that some event from my past is up for review.  I can sense the part of me who wants to win, come out on top or avoid the sorrow or pain altogether.  It is during the awareness of the replay that the realization comes to me, that this is a situation that is up for healing. By running the stories over and over in my mind, I use to think I was gathering resources for the future.  Preparing myself for the next time I had a similar encounter.  Or.., even more likely, building a wall around my heart or emotional body in an attempt to protect it from ever having one of these experiences again. These days, I still need my mind to create the distraction and bring the experiences forward.  But not...




Now Observe This!

They say that one of the ways to become more self-aware is to develop the skill of being the Observer of your own life. To witness yourself in action and instead of being attached to the actual event or experience you are having; allow yourself to be an impartial onlooker. Let’s say someone has just made a dangerous move in traffic, right in front of you. Not only are you surprised, you are likely angry and frightened by this close call. If you are in normal operating mode, you may react with intensity. You swear, send gestures, maybe scream at the driver of the car long gone. In ‘Observer’ mode, you are still surprised. You may even feel the anger. However, instead of going into full anger, you witness it. You contemplate the incident and begin to put things in perspective and context. Instead of screaming at the driver or going into road-rage, you calm yourself. Your anger never takes over. . . . . Learning to be an Observer of your life, is not something you do just for the heightened emotional situations. It is helpful during the mundane and ordinary times as well. As a matter of fact, the more you become a witness to your thoughts and emotions, the more it becomes a natural way of Being. This does not mean you don’t have thoughts and emotions, it simply means you are aware of them, and as a result, you influence them, they don’t control you. Observing your own reactions, behaviors and thoughts or emotions changes them. It changes you. Much like scientists have discovered; witnessing...

Now Observe This!

They say that one of the ways to become more self-aware is to develop the skill of being the Observer of your own life. To witness yourself in action and instead of being attached to the actual event or experience you are having; allow yourself to be an impartial onlooker. Let’s say someone has just made a dangerous move in traffic, right in front of you. Not only are you surprised, you are likely angry and frightened by this close call. If you are in normal operating mode, you may react with intensity. You swear, send gestures, maybe scream at the driver of the car long gone. In ‘Observer’ mode, you are still surprised. You may even feel the anger. However, instead of going into full anger, you witness it. You contemplate the incident and begin to put things in perspective and context. Instead of screaming at the driver or going into road-rage, you calm yourself. Your anger never takes over. . . . . Learning to be an Observer of your life, is not something you do just for the heightened emotional situations. It is helpful during the mundane and ordinary times as well. As a matter of fact, the more you become a witness to your thoughts and emotions, the more it becomes a natural way of Being. This does not mean you don’t have thoughts and emotions, it simply means you are aware of them, and as a result, you influence them, they don’t control you. Observing your own reactions, behaviors and thoughts or emotions changes them. It changes you. Much like scientists have discovered; witnessing...




Chaos

Chaos always precedes change. It is natural, it is inevitable. As we move through change, we have to let go of something familiar and begin integrating or assimilating something new. It is during this transition that chaos is most intense. For many of us, we are resisting the release of what was known and comfortable or we are rushing to get to the new finish-line; in the hope of finding a new point of balance and creating a new ‘status quo’. That sense of what was normal before we were surrounded by chaos! What happens when the amount of change in our lives becomes rapid and unavoidable? Many of us end up feeling like our life is in a constant state of turmoil! It is challenging to feel settled. Oftentimes we are waiting for the next disruption, simply because we have become accustom to the constant pace of change. Chaos becomes a personal challenge. We are frequently mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted from being in the constant motion and movement of change. This is especially true for those who are becoming more self-aware. For those who are evaluating what works and doesn’t work in their life. Perhaps there is a realization that old behaviors, patterns or habits are preventing them from reaching a goal, creating a relationship, feeling healthy or generally creating discomfort for them. Sometimes it is exposure to a concept, idea or belief that has them contemplating what is true for them in their current situation. Or finally deciding to live their dreams based on what motivates and inspires them, versus always choosing something that will make...

Chaos

Chaos always precedes change. It is natural, it is inevitable. As we move through change, we have to let go of something familiar and begin integrating or assimilating something new. It is during this transition that chaos is most intense. For many of us, we are resisting the release of what was known and comfortable or we are rushing to get to the new finish-line; in the hope of finding a new point of balance and creating a new ‘status quo’. That sense of what was normal before we were surrounded by chaos! What happens when the amount of change in our lives becomes rapid and unavoidable? Many of us end up feeling like our life is in a constant state of turmoil! It is challenging to feel settled. Oftentimes we are waiting for the next disruption, simply because we have become accustom to the constant pace of change. Chaos becomes a personal challenge. We are frequently mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted from being in the constant motion and movement of change. This is especially true for those who are becoming more self-aware. For those who are evaluating what works and doesn’t work in their life. Perhaps there is a realization that old behaviors, patterns or habits are preventing them from reaching a goal, creating a relationship, feeling healthy or generally creating discomfort for them. Sometimes it is exposure to a concept, idea or belief that has them contemplating what is true for them in their current situation. Or finally deciding to live their dreams based on what motivates and inspires them, versus always choosing something that will make...