by Paul (Site Admin) | Jun 2, 2013 | Blog, Solo Retreat
Today is my first day at Spirit Sky… A solo retreat for 6 days. The cabin is located in Pine AZ… About 20 miles beyond Payson. I have never been in this area before. It is quite beautiful. It is a much higher elevation than Phoenix (approximately 5500ft), which means it is cooler here. Today when I left Phoenix at about 11:30am, it was already about 90 degrees. The temperature when I arrived here at the cabin, was about 74. It is not what I expected, and it is still perfect. Somehow I had imagined being in a location where no one was around for miles… Isolated on a hilltop. The truth is… It is 4 acres on a hilltop that has a home being built about 50 yards away, and one roofline just over the crest of the hill… And a cabin/home that is not quite visible below. I think I imagined in my mind that the isolation would intensify the experience. It would offer a level of freedom that would allow me to tap into some primitive or untapped energies. A vision quest of sort… Out on the land, surviving in the elements and by my resourcefulness. AND… the truth is, that is not what I am doing. I am spending a week, in a comfortable cabin, with amazing views, surrounded by nature (I saw my first deer coming up the drive… And my first elk shortly after dinner, right out side the cabin!) I come with very little. I kept trying to sneak in projects… And you have no idea how much I wanted to bring...
by Paul (Site Admin) | Jun 2, 2013 | Blog, Solo Retreat
I slept well enough last night. The bed is probably a bit soft for my liking. A little before 6am I got up for a bit and went outside to enjoy the cool morning. Very peaceful at that time. Still, it felt like I could still sleep some more. The next time I awoke, there were two elk wandering the property. Not as close as I would like… But still a beautiful morning sight. There are benches all around the property. The one that I am most drawn to is across the drive on the knoll. It is placed inside a cluster of small alligator junipers. So it is in the shade most of the time. Today, the breeze is beautiful. Fresh air, cool breeze and just the sounds of nature to keep me company. On the one hand it is peaceful. On the other, I wonder what I will be doing for my time here? Moving from bench to chair, to rock to bench? It is odd not having something to do. Some place to go, something to prepare for, something to get done. I guess in some way, this is similar to a day off at home. Except at home, I have things to read. News on my iPad…or games. Music to listen to. Laundry to get done. There are distractions. And… Sometimes it is similar. I am simply existing. This morning I laid out a crystal grid for the day. This one was focused on Authenticity. Mind, body, spirit, Love, joy, clarity, compassion, strength, vitality, ease, grace and spirituality. It will be up until tomorrow morning…...
by Paul (Site Admin) | Jun 2, 2013 | Blog, Solo Retreat
This mornings grid is for “Fun”. The components are confident, stimulating, guided, flowing, foundational, natural, abundant, prosperous, mind, body, spirit. Initially when I awoke, I was feeling as though maybe I was sinking in or settling into this solo retreat thing. However, as the day wears on, I think instead maybe it is my mind, or more accurately my ego, playing a game with me. I find myself having thoughts about how I have already got what I needed from this experience… And perhaps it would be okay to go online… Maybe download a book. At one point I was thinking about exploring Pine. It took a bit for me to notice what was going on and to realize that this is uncomfortable. I am not sure what do do with myself, if I don’t have something to do. I can even find resistance to the mundane or chores… Folding my clothes, making the bed, that sort of thing. It is as if there is a voice inside my head saying… You can’t make me! It is interesting to catch this… As I think this is something that happens all the time. Our egos are resourceful… And they have different tapes or recordings they can pull out when the current message begins to lose its affect, keeping us in line or, from the egos perspective, safe. For the last two days I have been very aware of (because my ego has been talking to me about) my weight, energy level and health. Today… (The message from my ego is that) Everything is fine and I don’t have to stick...
by Paul (Site Admin) | Jun 2, 2013 | Blog, Solo Retreat
My crystal grid this morning is for Harmony. The components these crystals represent are Harmony, entrainment, flow, spectrum, balance, steady, ease, elegance, negotiation, uplifting and resonance. Today my retreat is starting out as a bit of a surprise. Even though I have tried to remain open for what this experience would bring… I realize I did have a few expectations or assumptions. I thought by giving myself this time, I would sink deeper into myself and start to see or recognize patterns, triggers, behaviors and such. You know, the ones that make life complicated or seem to get in the way of me having things the way I think they should be! Boy, is that a mouthful! However, my experience is just the opposite. I find it hard to focus on anything… It just doesn’t seem that interesting! My mind wanders… However, it doesn’t go to what is wrong… Instead, my eyes are drawn to beauty. There are much more than elk here! Now, don’t get me wrong… I don’t think this is a bad thing. It just seems like maybe I spend to much time worrying about the wrong things… Actually anything! Even as I write these words, I realize I spend a lot of time trying to control outcomes! Here there is nothing for me to control. If I want to sit by the stream, I do. If I want to lay down, I do. If I feel like making some notes on my iPad.., guess what? I do. Now mind you I still have a few days here and plenty more could be revealed. However… Nothing...
by Paul (Site Admin) | Jun 2, 2013 | Blog, Solo Retreat
Crystal grid for today is “Releasing Anger”. The crystals represent the following… Discovery, comprehending, contemplation, expression, learning, savor, own, release, breathe, allow, adjust. I went to sleep last night knowing that there was something brewing. Something that wanted to reveal itself, that had gone unnoticed. This morning, I think I know what that is and it the reason I chose the particular grid for today. This may be a bit had to convey properly, because I don’t want to leave you with the wrong impression. So let me start by saying up front… I love being gay and I love the Spiritual Being that I am. Yet last night, I was aware that I was angry about both! The other thing that I realized as I sat with this, is that when I trace the anger back or try to find who I am angry with… It is God. Which of course makes me aware that in this instance… I am thinking of God in the Christian sense. Old bearded white guy sitting on a throne somewhere. So this is my first clue that this anger is being held by my adolescent-self. And he doesn’t think God played fair! Life would be so much easier if I didn’t have to deal with being gay, or connecting to my spiritual journey in a unique way! If I could just look and be like the majority… If I could conform… If I fit in… Life would be easier! I think one of the things that reminded me of this was yesterday I was doing a video blog. I heard myself say,...
by Paul (Site Admin) | Jun 2, 2013 | Blog, Solo Retreat
I am going home later today. The last crystal grid here at Spirit Skies is “Contentment”. The crystals in this grid represent Contentment, breathing, relaxation, joyful, peace, stability, belonging, communication, decisive, and beauty. It is interesting to be thinking about leaving. There are parts of me that are ready and can’t wait to be back at home with Fito, my amazing husband, our dog Archie and to just sleep in my own bed! There is so much I appreciate about my life… Perhaps even more as a result of stepping away from it. There is also a part of me that is in fear that I won’t be able to hold on to the piece and tranquility I have found this past week. That some of the clarity and resolve that was found so easily here in nature…, will be lost in the day-to-day grind that is our lives. Just sitting with this today makes me aware that once again, my mind wanted to make this retreat a destination, and not simply part of the journey. I can see how I had invested a lot of energy into thinking that this retreat would “change” everything that felt out of alignment. That my problems would be solved and I would have clarity of direction. The truth is… We all probably need to give ourselves a week, once a year to de-stress! We need to find a way to slow down, check out and let our minds clear. This is not a destination… This is PART of the journey. The gift of time to ourselves is priceless. I leave here more...
by Charles McAlpine | Mar 11, 2013 | Blog
Earlier this week, I was working with a crystal (Picasso Jasper), in preparation for a workshop. The properties of this particular crystal were stimulating creativity, dissolving blockages to our creativity, and helping to move beyond excuses! What has really stuck in my mind was the awareness… That we only create blockages for the things we really care about or that “matter” to us! Isn’t that profound? On one level I know this so well. On another, it makes it so clear that each day the things we spend our time and energy on, are the things that we manifest! You see we all have ideas, dreams, desires, hopes, visions, images, and thoughts for our possible futures. However it is the ones we continually revisit or where we invest our thoughts and emotions, that we are creating. If you have a thought.., (You see a cute puppy, and you think… Wouldn’t it be fun to be surrounded by puppies all the time!?!) and then the thought is gone. You may have planted a seed, however that does not mean anything will ever grow from this. However, if you have such a strong connection to animals and can’t see or imagine yourself doing anything other than caring for and being surrounded by them… That is a different scenario altogether! Then you begin to see animal related opportunities all around you. Your behavior around them has other people take notice. Caring for and interacting with them becomes a part of your conversations. Others who are drawn to animals take notice and start to share their own stories and connections with people and...
